A Love Letter to the Thank You Letter

Because Some Things Should Never Be Reduced to a Text

Dear Reader,

I was recently asked, “What’s your favorite type of letter to write?”

Hands down, it’s the thank you letter. (You can have a favorite type of letter? you ask. Yes. Just like you can have a favorite donut. Don’t argue with me.)

It just so happens, this Friday (the day after Christmas) is National Thank You Note Day, which feels like the perfect moment to pause and say thank you. Truly. For reading. For subscribing. For accompanying me on this year-long journey of writing about letters.

Why is the thank you letter my favorite? you ask again. (You’re asking a lot of questions today, but in the spirit of the holidays, I’ll let it slide.)

Because there’s something deeply meaningful about receiving a card in the mail, opening it, and realizing someone took the time to sit down and write to you. It hits differently than a text ever could.

Here are a few examples of thank you notes I’ve received over the years:

“Thank you for allowing me to read your story (Half In) Felice. I hope you get the break worthy of your commitment and talent. Your sensitivity is impressive. It was a pleasure to meet you.” —Bill Moyers, Journalist and former White House Press Secretary

“Thank you for the kind words. I had a wonderful time with you. Now if I could just get you to ride a horse.” —Rita Mae Brown, Author

“Thank you for last night. I had forgotten what that warm fuzzy, feeling inside was like.” —An Ex (from the 90s)

“Thank you for being so wonderful. It’s nice to have a friend like you that no matter how much time passes it doesn’t matter.”
—Childhood friend

I also love thank you letters because they have a clear purpose. They say, I see what you did, and it mattered to me. I write thank you notes not just for gifts, but after someone invites me somewhere as their guest, gives me a ride, or simply shows up when I need a friend. Those moments count. They deserve acknowledgment.

The fact that there’s an actual day dedicated to writing thank you notes says something about their value.

Of the 357 (and counting!) letters I’ve written this year, at least 50 have been thank you letters. That’s not an accident. I genuinely believe they’re the most important kind of letter we write.

As it turns out, there are real benefits to writing thank you notes:

• They strengthen relationships by acknowledging thoughtfulness.

• They improve mental well-being. Studies show they can boost happiness and reduce symptoms of depression.

• They create a lasting impression in a world of texts and emails.

• Sending a thank you note after a work interview sets you apart by signaling thoughtfulness and attention to detail.

• They show respect by letting someone know their effort was received.

Are there rules about timing? Miss Manners says “promptly,” but we both know a late thank you is always better than no thank you.

That’s why every paid subscriber to this Substack (whether it’s $5 or $150) receives a handwritten letter from me. And starting in 2026, paid subscribers will receive even more. Stay tuned.

With love (and a stack of thank you cards at the ready),
Felice

P.S. Can you think of one person you meant to thank but never did? Reminder: it’s never too late!

SONG OF THE WEEK

Send No Letter by The Velvet Underground (But of course, send one!)

ATTENTION BOOK LOVERS: Your Dream Cruise Is Here!

Felice Cohen is an award-winning author, best known for squeezing big ideas into small spaces—like her 90-square-foot NYC apartment (yes, really). Her books include Half In: A Coming-of-Age Memoir of Forbidden Love, 90 Lessons for Living Large in 90 Square Feet, and What Papa Told Me, with praise from legends like Elie Wiesel and Rita Mae Brown. Her viral YouTube tour has racked up over 25 million views—mostly from people wondering where she kept her shoes. More at felicecohen.com.